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Updated: Jul 8

Give your brain the proof it needs that you are safe to achieve your desires with this simple process. Plus, a love note to Fear.


There is a simple way to free yourself of unnecessary fear, anxiety, worry and resistance. It’s so simple that you will probably disregard it at first. With just a few minutes, you can change your reality.

First, let’s all acknowledge that fear is absolutely necessary to protect you in genuinely harmful situations. The process discussed here is not intended for life/death scenarios or extreme circumstances. In these cases, fear is the exact instinct you want to fight, flee, and get help as appropriate.  

The process I’m sharing today IS about those moments when you are growing, stepping out of your comfort zone, trying something new, and you WANT IT– but, you’re also nervous about all the unknowns, so your brain starts to make excuses about why to not to do anything that brings you closer to your desired goal.

You know that phrase “get out of your own head”? Well, this process is the method for that– and it works. Your brain is a beautiful thing: it’s so creative and protective that it really can get in your own way sometimes. 

I used this process on a long-weekend work trip recently. I KNEW I was going to have fun, learn, and make some brilliant new connections. But, I was also nervous. I felt it in my body, and I was having trouble showing up as the best version of me. This was an important weekend for my business so I asked myself: what can I do to understand why my stomach felt inches lower than normal; why my heart beat a little quicker; why my brain buzzed with thoughts to play it safe?

I carry my journal pretty much everywhere, so I started writing. I made a quiet space to list ALL of my fears about the weekend’s events. Here’s the exact entry (transcribed word for word from my personal journal, see photo below): 

June 14th

What am I nervous/afraid of today at ASD

(naming it lets it go):

  • Of being awkward

  • Not having stamina for the weekend

  • Not giving results

  • Being overwhelmed

  • Not having clients

  • Being swarmed – THIS I WANT ACTUALLY :) 

  • Being wrong

  • Ruining relationships


I am already laughing! These are silly! Okay play BIG!)

  • Not having energy

  • Starting convos * - I’ve done it for 26 years

It took maybe 2 minutes before I started smiling. I even chuckled to myself because all my feelings were so…predictable! My fears were practically boring to the point I felt silly about some of them! One of them, as noted above, I actually really wanted to happen but was nervous to actually get it. It took mere moments to shift from getting down on myself to realizing (once again) that I hold the power

Each of my 8 written fears either: had a solution, or didn’t matter because I had experienced it millions of times in my life– and overcome it. My fears weren’t unique or special. My chest immediately lightened at this proof that I hold the key to my experience. 

Your brain craves the perceived safety of what is known. Familiarity is comforting. You know this, but you forget it once fear creeps in. You forget that your heart rate and thoughts get a little faster only because something feels unfamiliar. 

For your brain, anything that is unknown qualifies as being unsafe. Anything unsafe registers as a threat to your absolute main objective to survive and should therefore be avoided at all costs! What if you used this logic every time you did something new or under new circumstances? You probably would’ve have filed your taxes, asked out the now-love-of-your-life, done a cold-water plunge. There is so much discomfort that you almost avoided that has led to comfort, ease, pleasure, and beauty in your life. 

The next time you notice you’re feeling anxious, avoidant, blocked, or genuinely afraid of that next task or commitment, do the four-step process below. You will build confidence and release unnecessary anxieties of everyday life. 

The process is simple, just 4 steps. It will require you to:

  1. Give yourself permission to take the time (a few moments) to acknowledge the fierce Protector part of you wanting you to be safe to a fault

  2. Get really and truly HONEST with yourself about your fears and what you think you fear

I used this process again this past week and my fears around some business decisions were bigger, more complex, and took a couple of days for me to work through. I asked big questions of myself and of people I trust. I sought out podcasts, time alone, and books. 

Somewhere amidst all the questions and allowing all of my thoughts to be seen, I was guided back to another simple realization: just start. Fear of not knowing what I was doing or how things would play out were holding me back from taking action. I reminded myself that I love learning, and that means learning from making mistakes. A trusted advisor also reminded me that I will make the wrong choices sometimes, but you just have to keep making choices. Funny, because I’ve had “keep going” on a sticky note on my bathroom mirror for years now to remind me of that exact advice… ;) 

Fear is powerful. It can show up as avoidance, resistance, frustration, anger, inaction, even lead to depression/apathy. Fear can stop you from doing what you know you want to and can achieve. It can create cycles of thoughts and behaviors that ultimately aren’t serving you. For this reason, it is better to name the fear than to ignore it. Acknowledge its power and then decide if you will let it be the only power that drives your choice. 

The chances are high that, most of what you are going through, you’ve already overcome the fears and anxieties countless times before. The context may look a little different, but you have proof that you’ve been here and survived– even thrived afterwards! How is that for a boost of confidence? You’ve done this before.


  1. Write down an exhaustive list of any fear/anxiety/worry/nerves you’re feeling

    1. Exhaustive means when you think you're done, keep asking: what else makes me nervous about...? Lay it all on the table. You'll know when you've gotten it all out.

  2. Take a few conscious deep sighs while reviewing your paper

  3. Notice what it feels like to see the words. 

    1. Where in your body do you feel lighter now? 

    2. Are there any that still feel heavy, scary, or big?

  4. For the items that still cause an uncomfortable sensation to read (like a stomach drop or nervous heart flutter), journal more about that scenario. 

    1. What would happen if this played out? 

    2. Where does this fear come from? 

    3. Have you experienced it before?

    4. What do you need for this to also feel lighter/easier? (ex. professional assistance, more education, support from a friend, a new plan, changing your outfit, a different tool/resource, etc.)

If you find yourself needing this exercise on a regular basis and still have resistance, or are unsure how to use this tool with success in your personal circumstances, you would benefit from professional support. My clients become more self-empowered to do this work comfortably on their own when as soon as we start working together using biomagnetism, breathwork, and using methods just like this one in our sessions.

Nerves, worry, fear and anxiety are all NORMAL. It is not normal, however, to be constantly fearful of bad things happening or your body to feel anxious around the clock. Book a session with me and you’ll start to feel clearer and calmer right away. It is possible for you to have a peace of mind that gives you better sleep and feeling calm in your social scenarios.

Until next time, with love ~ katie 

A love note to Fear:

Thank you, Fear, for your protection. 

We see you. We love you. We need you. 

Your advice is always welcome, and,

we recognize your input as a suggestion–

not as the final decision.


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